Fear. It lurks and tries to creep it’s way into our minds. Slowly, sneaky, creeping fear. Sometimes fear starts as a tiny seed that we hardly know is there. Soon it grows and the root of fear takes over our minds, our emotions and the way we live out our lives. The Bible has much to say about fear. Infact, the words “Fear Not” are repeatedly penned in Scripture. Yet, if we are to be honest we still fear. How can we stop?
I grew up afraid. Perhaps it was because I was a latch key kid by first grade with my parents leaving me in the early dark mornings all by myself. One of my earliest memories is being paralyzed by fear as I waited for daylight, with one eye always on the front door fearing someone breaking in. Who knows for sure, but fear grew in me, stayed with me and must be addressed within me even as an adult. I guess you can say that I had a habit of thinking in fear and living in the confines of fear. I realize this is not something we broadcast. You don’t walk into a dinner party and meet someone new by saying, ” Hi, I’m Debbie and I struggle with fear.” Nope. We put on our brave faces and go through life with fear and worry on the underside. It’s this underside that Jesus wants to address in our lives and give us new freedom in.
These days my fears would be considered normal. I have breast cancer , had surgery about two weeks ago, and will begin the rest of the treatment this fall. Funny thing is, with cancer they give no promises. They have told me the prognosis is good, even great. Still with cancer cells there is the looming invariable of it coming back regardless of what surgery or treatment is implemented. Fear, in this time, would be considered normal.
But, is normal what is best for me? Is normal a path to mental, emotional and spiritual freedom? Often our normal is based on past experience, habits of thinking, and the way we have dealt with life before today. If, like me, you are used to being afraid or skilled at worrying, your normal is not what is best for you.
So how do we stop?
In order to calm our hearts regarding fear we must get a true revelation of God’s love and care for us. We talk about his love but we often don’t believe what our mouths are saying. If we believed, we would not be as worried and not be as fearful. Jesus addressed this in Matthew 6. The words of Christ speaking to us today, can begin to penetrate even the scariest places within us. He speaks to those, like us, who have HIM as their Father. He speaks to them, and us, about His care and how we have no need to worry any longer. Take a look…
“I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear…and why do you worry…If God clothes the grass of the field, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? So do not worry…For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows what you need. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow…” Matthew 6
“My sheep follow me…no one can snatch them out of my hand…” John 10
“Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship? No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us…” Romans 8
“Perfect love casts out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made complete in love…” 1 John 4
So how do we stop?
Habits of thinking and reacting to life are strongly rooted within us. They don’t magically go away over night. We must embrace the truth of His love. Step by step, day by day, we practice living in the truth.We ask Jesus by the power of His Holy Spirit to make God’s love real to us. To make God’s care real to us on a level that goes beyond our human understanding. For me today that means, I know I have cancer, but that doesn’t define me. A diagnosis doesn’t define my life, but the truth that I am in good, loving hands, defines me. I am protected. I may go through things, but Jesus will always care for me and be with me. The same is true for you. What defines us is that we are God’s daughters. He is our Father and HE has us.
What are you dealing with? Fear comes in all shapes and sizes. Some are afraid of loss, rejection, financial difficulty, friendship deliemas, people treating you unfairly, the idea of being alone….it goes on and on….Can you agree with Scripture today that you have a Father, and He knows what you need right now? You have a Father, a heavenly Father, and He is caring for you as sure as the sun rose this morning and will set this evening. Be calm. Be strong. Look Up. Embrace the truth. You are never alone!
Living as His,
Debbie
My fear is that my husband will walk on me and that I will become his doormat. My fear is that I am not as sigmificant as he is and that I don’t matter as much. I fight to stand up next to him but it seems like he always has something over me and I can never quite attain his status. At his feet I crumble because I don’t have the strength or power that he has. In my attempt to be equal to him, I work on myself physically (exercising); because it makes me feel empowered. That’s why I keep at it and I don’t give up because it makes me feel strong. But I’m realizing that I just can’t win this battle by myself and I haven’t been looking up. I’ve been looking within. I haven’t asked God to empower me yet. I need to partner with him. Thanks for your encouragement today, Debbie! What you say makes a difference and I think a lot about your words and advice. And I like the stories that you share.
Heidi,
I am praying for you, your marriage, your strength to be continually renewed in trusting God. He is with you. Don’t give up. Many blessings and much love!
Hi Debbie – so very sorry to hear that you are facing the challenge of breast cancer. . . . I – and the “WiLD women” in Wisconsin – will be praying for you. One of my favorite WiLD women here is a breast cancer survivor and her journey has been such a powerful testimony of God’s love and care. A word of encouragement to the encourager: May God’s peace which transcends all understanding “garrison and mount guard over your heart and mind in Christ Jesus.”
Hi Diane! Wouldn’t it be WILD if I really trusted God in this? Yep it would be, and it will be, because I am setting my heart and mind in that direction. I trust God is blessing you tremendously as you minister to those in your area. Thanks for your encouragement over the past year. It has meant more to me than you know. It is recorded in my journals and it is eternal encouragement. Hugs from California! And, many blessings!
Thank you for sharing, Debbie. My heart breaks for you as that little girl. Yet I’m praising God that He has intervened into your life and is breaking that hold. I’ve seen your faith in action and that stronghold is only holding on by one fingernail. I’m continuing to pray for complete healing and protection from any re-occurrence. Love you!
And for Heidi who posted above, I’ll be praying for you, Heidi. I know the Lord wants to empower you to find your strength in His wonderful love for you. Your husband doesn’t define you but you can find value in you being a child of God as you know Jesus as Savior and Lord. God bless you!
Thank you Kathy! You have always been an inspiration to me. God has used you to inspire, teach and love on many of His women. Thank you for your faithfulness and for your prayers. Love to you!
hello Debbie,
I am a Wild woman from Wisconsin who was very blessed to read one of your books last year…Diane O’Connor is my good friend. I am also a breast cancer survivor of 6 years. It seems just like yesterday when I got the dreadful report. I had a complete mastectomy of the right breast and went through four months of chemo. I was 44 years old when I was diagnosed and have no family history. I remember going through some moments of paralyzing fear but God kept me very close to His heart throughout the ordeal. Going through my cancer experience helped me experience God in a deeply personal, life-changing way. My prayer throughout was,” God, please don’t waste this cancer.” I believe my life is much richer for having traveled through that dark season of my life. I pray the same for you. The Lord has gifted you with the wonderful ability to transparently share your faith that is inspiring and deeply moving, Joshua 1:9 “Have I not commanded you? Do not be frightened or dismayed. Be strong and courageous for The Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” Blessings upon your healing journey. Incidentally, I just picked up 30 day Faith Dare…I am looking forward to further inspiration and spiritual growth.
Richelle, Thank you for your words of encouragement! I am so glad that your cancer journey has brought you into a greater depth with the Lord. That is my prayer as well as I walk through this. Knowing that God doesn’t waste anything, by primary thought is to be Paying Attention to him along the path. May God bless you in every way as you move forward, love Jesus more, and continue in good health! Hugs!
Debbie,
This morning, God put you across my path. I had gone to the Bible Cafe to see what they were studying next and there you were! I went to your blog and read your post on fear and breast cancer. A year ago, I was fighting this fight. I was even honored to share my journey at Woman’s Bible Cafe. You are in for the adventure of a lifetime. God has some amazing experiences in store for you. This post expresses how God kept me safe and in His arms throughout the journey.
http://cindy-aquietplace.blogspot.com/2012/04/do-i-feel-alone.html
I can’t wait to take your 30 Day Faith Dare! Please know that I am adding you to my prayer list. Blessings from Arkansas, Cindy
I was raised with fear, always told don’t do that you’ll get hurt. You can do that, it’s too dangerous. Don’t say that, what would people think. As a result, I didn’t learn to ski, ride horses or motorcycles. Well, maybe I did a bit in spite of the warnings but somehow as I grew older my mother’s fear became mine and now I struggle to overcome them daily. The most debilitating are the fear of the “what ifs”. What if something goes wrong. What if I get sick? What if the delivery doesn’t go well? What if the baby has something wrong? What if the state stops paying our retirement checks? What if the whole country collapses?
I can go on and on worrying about things that will probably not happen but thankfully the Holy Spirit steps in and reminds me I am not a captive of my fears anymore. I can turn them over to the Lord and trust Him to see me through whatever lies ahead. Praise God for His faithfulness.
Hi Debbie,
I am new to the BibleCafe and your blog. The Faith Dare will be my first online study. I too struggle with fear and am breaking out of a co-dependency rut of over 35 years. I am also getting ready to go in for my third breast imaging scan in 6 months. I am really looking forward to what the Lord has in store for this study. Fear has paralyzed me to move on for so long, that at times I just want to quit treading water and sink. But praise the Lord, I also know my God is bigger and stronger than the enemy, and my sights are still lifted up. I will be praying for you.
I do have a way sometimes of excusing what is “normal” in myself. It’s normal to worry, normal to lose my temper, normal to be impatient…and so it goes. As you asked, though: “is normal what is best for me? Is normal a path to mental, emotional and spiritual freedom?” I see in Scripture how God called people out of normal and into communion with Him. He calls us out of darkness, out of fear, out of excuses, out of sin and makes us new. Thanks for leading us in the Faith Dare!!
I’ve walked in your shoes, a very long time ago (different type of cancer) and I know what “haunting, joy stealing, questioning” fear is all about. I admit I didn’t handle my fear very well at the time, even though I was a Christian. You seem very “centered” and mature, so I pray you can continue on your journey in total belief and peace. God bless and keep you.